The Charade

Charade:

A classic example of what happened to a Hitchcock film when it wasn't made by Hitchcock. Shot in 1963, four years after Cary Grant's turn with Eva Marie Saint in North by Northwest

It's not that Charade is a bad film but it seems to be a good example of Hollywood trying to be too many types to appeal to the widest audience possible. Which makes it a little to long and without a good solid rhythm throughout. If it was just a straight thriller then the comedy that drags that part of it down would have never been in place to start with. If it was a comedy then the suspense portion would have only been used as a set up for the various gags that take place in the film. If it was a romance then both the suspense and the comedy would have been the framework for the lead characters initial meeting and subsequent adventures. Cary Grant for example is an actor with a fair amount of range and his comedic side works great as the fast talking and self entitled Madison Avenue ad man in North by Northwest. It does not slow down or burden the momentum of the thriller at all but instead adds dimension to the character as he makes his way through what are really a comedy of errors cleverly disguised as a fast pace and suspenseful film. The film knows what it is and only uses other techniques as garnishes to enhance the flavor. Charade seems to have no idea of what it is and we are left with what could have been a stellar film comes across as nothing more than slightly entertaining. I chose this poster of the many that were made to show how confused the makers of this film were. Here you have the two main characters running for what appears to be their lives and then an inset smiley PR photo right next to them. It is obvious that these two had amazing box office pull and that maybe this film was made with just that in mind.




Which brings up Audrey Hepburn. Here is a funny attractive and somewhat talented star that defines this era of American cinema. She is in one moment sassy, funny, cute, smart, heartbreaking, witty, pathetic, savvy, quick on her feet and ridiculous. All of these are great except that similar to Grant and the rest of the film it just gets confusing and hard to get your teeth sunk into. I found it very hard to care about the ultimate fates these characters due to the fact that the while I was trying to sign on to their plight I was being distracted by all sorts of other foolishness. This is a film where there is a whole lot of money, violence, deceit, and heartbreak are the center of attention. Probably not a place that you think one would find goofy comedic gags and sappy romance but there they are in force.


Like I said not a bad film but one that you may in the end wonder why you endured for so long or why you were never quite pushed to the point of pulling the trigger on it.

-Bitter MacGregor









So when Bitter told me he reviewed "The Charade" I rolled my eyes, asked the wall "why the fuck did he review that?" and then I reserved it from the Library.

I love the Library. I know I'm not supposed to capitalize Library, but I love it so much I do it anyway. Since I was home schooled, I often change the rules of english just like I often change the rules of math, so I'm Constantly capitalizing things i Shouldn't be. So normally, when I reserve a non new release from the P.L. (public Library) it arrives at my local branch in no time at all. For some stupid reason, there were all these slackers out there who also had reserved "The Charade" and I had to wait almost 2 flipin weeks. I was amazed. To give you an example, when I reserved "Die Hard 2" and "The Karate Kid Trilogy" it took like 2 days. Why were the people of Seattle wanting to see this movie? Was it really good? Were they also writing movie blogs and their friends were making them watch stupid films? The only way to find out was to get a job at the big "L" and hack into the Library system. Unfortunately they refused my application. This was Yet Another downfall of being Home schooled.

The movie finally arrived and I walked down to my local Bibliotech to pick it up. When I grabbed it off the reserve shelf I glanced at the cover and 2 things baffled me. For starters it was a Criterion Collection edition. I had always been under the impression that the suits at Criterion had some sort of standards and practices and weren't swayed by studio pay offs and back door touchy feely sessions. Secondly, the cover art was making it look like a James Bond film and the feeling in my loins was telling me this hotdog wasn't a ballpark. I went up to the librarian and asked her "what the fuck is up with this shit?", she told me my language was inaproppriate and I would have to leave the Library immediately. So I left, not wanting to make too much of a fuss since I'm there everyday and I can't afford to be blacklisted from the Library. It does sound pretty cool to be blacklisted from the Library, as if I were a revolutionary writer or a porn king. So being the good little home schooled boy I am, I went home and watched "The Charade."

Now I could of written a review without ever having watched this film (I hear a lot of the fat cat review boys do that all the time) but no, I sat down and pioneered through every last frame.

I do not know the exact length of "The Charade" but I believe it's somewhere in the neighborhood of eight hours long. It's the type of movie I'm sure my Grandpa loved, 50 years ago on a sunday when he was drunk and high on pain killers. As Bitter already pointed out, the movie jumps from a spy film to a zany episode of "Rowan and Martin's Laugh In" with the actors spitting out their lines in awkward uniformity. Remember when you were just a kid and you and your friend were trying to convince your friend's older sister into taking off her clothes for some dumb experiment you invented just to get her to strip for you? Well the movie dialogue is delivered in the same unconvincing fashion and the outcome is also very similar, disappointing. Needless to say, this film has seen it's heyday and that heyday is long gone, so don't expect to be seeing any boobies.


-Plow